Firsts

You said you were in love with me
but I wasn't your first.

My burning fingertips
ran rampant
on your battle-struck armour
I engraved your scars
in my memory
So I could forget
my own wars.

Steaming whispers
of wine and cigarettes
told me I was special
as you welded yourself
on to my skin
But was it really me
That you wanted?

Was I the name
your mind whispered
when you poured yourself
another drink?
Was I the one
that made you feel
fulfilled?

Your mind was a pirate ship
And she was your storm
She was aching bones
and bleeding hearts
And I was nothing more
Than a paper cut.

That raging tempest left you blind
and you failed to notice
How I had met a hurricane
Whose torrent smelt like gin.

She stole the wind from my sails
And left fault lines
In my rib cage
Her lying kisses are still emblazoned
on this ashen skin
you caress.

I said I was in love with you,
but you weren't mine either.